Love instead of compete

My dearest girls,

This week we’ve been reflecting on envy, how destructive it can be to our souls and what we can do to combat it. To help us move away from envy, we can continuously pray and live in the virtue of kindness.

Sandra mentioned how easy it is for women to be envious of other women and I know this all too well. When I wasn’t dating anyone, the term “dress to impress” meant impress the men and compete with the women. I felt like I had to one-up the other women if I wanted to ever be loved. Certain life experiences have strengthened this sense of competition with my sisters and although I don’t dress to impress men, I still feel a sense of competition when it comes other women.

You know what this kind of thinking does? It pits me against my sisters when all I desire is to be close with them. I desire for women to build each other up, to have compassion for themselves and for their sisters. I want to thank God for the women I see, instead of complain to Him that I am not as (blank) as her or that I'm more (blank) than her. When I become envious, I often judge and I don’t want to be doing that. I want to love! It is my calling so it is also naturally my desire!

All the energy used towards envy, through thoughts, words and deeds, is a huge reservoir of potential strength that us women can tap into for our growth. Instead of feeling threatened by other women, we could start to feel strengthened through our bonds with them. Instead of labelling other women the moment we see them, why don’t we make it our mission to get to know their hearts and bring out the absolute best in them? Why don’t we fight envy with the VIRTUE OF KINDNESS. Kill envy with kindness.

Kindness starts with my thoughts, and reshaping them if they are not helping me live a life of love. “Thank you God for creating so many beautiful women in the world!” “It’s great that she is able to do (blank) and that I can do (blank). We each had a different and unique purpose.” Right now I may not believe those thoughts, because as we know “the journey from the heart to the mind is a long one”. But I do know that when I put in the effort, God’s grace completes the rest.

Lord, help me build deep connections with the women in my life. Help us bond together so that we can discover our worth and purpose and together fulfil the calling You have given to each of us. Help me focus on my purpose, as my sister Diana shared. I fall into envy so often, but that is not what I want. What I desire is community, love and growth. Help me fulfil these desires, I know it is what you also want for your daughters. We love You.


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