Lens of Truth
For years I was willing to do anything and (almost) everything to get the attention of men, and the approval of specific women. I equated this attention as love, and if I'm "loved", in this way, by others, I'm enough… or so I thought. I believed that my sense of worth would come from the world rather than from the inside of my being.
Firstly, when I live from this place, I don't get to know people, I use them so that I could feel better about myself. This unintentionally dehumanizes people by making them into a means (to an end) rather than a human being with wants, needs, likes, dislikes, and various experiences.
This severely limits my ability to connect with myself and with others. I lose sense of who I am and then I don't know how to "behave" in front of others because I'm so focused on pleasing everyone, in order to obtain approval.
Now, more in line with our overall topic, when we don't understand how valuable we are, we accept whatever comes by, whether or not it's good for us. We just want someone or something to fill the emptiness that we have inside of us.
Even though I sought the superficial, what I really wanted, was (is) to be loved, cherished, and accepted as I am. I want(ed) to live freely, without the bondage of needing to measure up.
When we come to see how beautiful, precious, and special we are, we uncover that we deserve the world. As we learn to love ourselves, we stop collecting tiny pieces of whatever we can (in relationships, in our jobs, everywhere) and wait for the feast. We also learn to stop waiting around for someone to tell us that we're enough. Instead, we replace self-defeating thoughts with truth and choose to believe that we are enough. Gradually, we see that there is not a single thing we need to change in order to be enough.
Sometimes our past experiences serve as "proof" of our inadequacy. Bit by bit, sometimes with the help of professionals, we learn to see things differently. No longer is our worth dependent on how others treat us because we come to know that their treatment of people is a reflection of their heart, not of our worth.
As we slowly learn to see through the lens of truth, our true worth is discovered.
We choose to believe that we're enough because we've seen what not believing it does to our hearts and minds, and to the people around us. We finally see that what was created was, and is still, GOOD.
Sister, choose to believe that you're enough and you will more easily know what you deserve, and you will be better equipped to live a life of compassion, for yourself and for others.