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Be gentle with yourself


Do you have any tips when it comes to focusing?


I chose this quote because this is exactly what I struggle with, particularly while being unemployed. I take a little step to the left and then a little to the right and then a little bit forward and then a little bit back, and then I repeat. Since I'm not at a country bar, this square dancing does me no good. It actually hinders me greatly.


And so, I have been learning that it is critical, for my wellbeing, to choose one goal to focus on - to go either left OR right - and to add more to my plate only if I am doing the other tasks well and have enough in me to do more. Until then, it doesn't seem that I can handle more than one goal at a time. "Christian know thyself" they say, and this is probably why - know what you can handle, what will challenge you just right and what is too much... and then learn to say no.


Anyways, what also helps me is the ability to laugh at myself as I catch myself doing silly things - like loosing sleep over whether or not to buy clothes at a massive warehouse sale. Like what???? Because I have found shame counterproductive, even if what I do makes absolutely no sense, I do everything I can not to go down the shame route. And so, I learn to laugh, or at least smirk while shaking my head, at myself and then make a concrete plan to live differently.


This is an ongoing process for me, as distractions are a huge temptation, but I'm moving in the right direction (I square dance less), and it feels real good.


I hope that this is at least somewhat helpful to you, even if just to spark some introspective reflection. Be gentle with yourself as you learn to direct your mind to where you want it to be

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