• CWG

Acceptance isn't a stamp of approval


It is hard to accept reality as it is, especially when it is nowhere near our vision of "correct" or "good". Acceptance does not mean that we approve of the situation or of someone's behavior and allow injustices to take place.


Using acceptance, we simply acknowledge reality for what it is and, if needed, we work to change it based on what is.


If you wanted to go on a road trip but didn't accept that you were missing a tire, you wouldn’t get anywhere. What would help you get moving is accepting that you only have 3 out of 4 tires. You probably don't like that you only have 3 tires, but unfortunately, nothing can be done until you accept that "it is what it is". You may feel angry or worried, and that's okay. Feelings will pass.


If you want to make the situation different, you can look at what you have the power to change. In this situation, you can get a new tire, get a rental car, or borrow someone else's car. What you can't control is whether or not stores are open, whether or not available rental cars work with your budget and whether or not someone will trust you with their car for a week.


Sometimes, we learn to accept without needing to "fix". I say "fix" in quotations because sometimes our solutions are not as helpful as we'd like to think. Anyways, when people think differently than we do we may want to "fix" their perspective. Rather than hearing out what is on their heart we end up prescribing cough drops for their knee pain that we didn't even know existed.


Again, acceptance isn't a stamp of approval, nor should it prevent us from speaking truth. Additionally, having to accept something doesn't mean that "they're wrong and I have to tolerate this". Sometimes fear of change prevents us from seeing the good in something.


Acceptance allows us to be in tune with reality and better understand the person or situation. It is an opportunity to drop personal judgments and develop patience, humility, and empathy. Lastly, it teaches us to focus on what we are able to, let go of what we can't do, and rest in trust.


It takes a lot of practice, so start today and be gentle with yourself in this process of learning

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